Don’t Be Yourself, Exactly

Where did this golden gem of wisdom originate?  Couldn’t be too old right? It isn’t all that long ago where being unapologetically “yourself” would get your exiled, killed or perhaps burned as a witch.  Yet, you always hear it. “Just be yourself.” “Nooooooo” says I, in a high voice and shaking my head violently.

First, many translate that into wearing your sweats and Star Trek t-shirts out in public.  Those who have communication issues, tend towards bashfulness and the lazy will embrace such words and rationalize that they are “just being themselves.”

No one are themselves!  You don’t have to go as deep as the id, ego and super ego here.  Forget about hereditary vs the environment and the 3 in the morning, high as a kite debate on exactly the reasons why you are what you are.  Before any of that, there is this thing we call natural law where one of  seven life processes when examined  closely, and translate loosely will state, “You do NOT just be yourself.”

Before I go farther I will testify I have known some and I my self live on that fringe of always “just being yourself” and fortunately I have other qualities that make up for it.  For I tell you now, if I had been beaten with the ugly stick people would not be sticking around long enough to get to know me.  I would be in a cave somewhere ranting to my furry collection of rabid squirrel minions.

A peacock doesn’t walk around with his feathers fanned out all the time, his ass would fall off.   You think bears knock down tress for shits and giggles?  Natures lumberjack?   “Just being yourself,” is overt sabotage.  You might not know its obvious, you might not even realize you do it consciously, but its obvious.

Insecurities you wish not to confront, short comings you refuse to work on and long-term emotional abuse towards yourself.  While everyone who is getting laid are doing everything from transforming their bodies to reading books to become more interesting or learn the nuances of human interaction.

The first image that pops us in peoples heads with this topic is the uber geek.  So we will go with that.  Dude, plenty of people like what ever, D&D, Star Wars, etc.  But they don’t push it on others.   They don’t hold their values  above others,  and for the love of God they don’t talk about it to women.   There are only a few reasons why a man will talk on about something a woman has most likely no interest in.

1. They are the arrogant, whether hot-shot yuppie or uber geek, they feel that their interests are the only things worth having interest in, and well love to hear themselves talk.   2. Nervous. He wants it to end but he is stuck  babbling uncontrollably about whatever  they know, dieing for her to either kiss him or stuff a roll in his mouth. 3. He is hoping he can look smart and betting that you are unfamiliar enough with the topic that he can bullshit the gaps and embellish with out the woman catching on.

You dress according to cultural norms.  Yes, no, no yes YES you do.  You can have a little style and individuality but if you don’t have the talent for that then you have sheep it out with the rest.  One cannot dress a decade behind or in a way that is going to divert attention away from…..wait for it.. you.   See the sabotage?   One can easily wear  hideously non- matching attire and talk about….why just give one semi witty example?

Lets list them:  Star Trek, Tabloid stars, Star Wars, Star Jones.  Shoes, Horses, Shopping, Shoes, yes twice. Shopping for shoes and the clothing worn by other people.  The ex’s, the sex’s, your pinto, scooter, or even your Lexus.  Bodily functions, your mother, your diet, divorce or diseases. Leave out the fact that you’re a little bit of a racist and your prerequisites in regards to income, and or the sizes of anything.

Where were we? Ah yes.  You can go dressing like a colorblind caveman whom just thawed out of an  ice block and is merely thrilled to have this new thing called cotton against his skin.  And you can go about “keepin it real” with your choices in conversation and over all demeanor.  What you’re really doing is throwing up walls because you are scared to death of having someone truly take interest for you think that the person you shield is even more hideous than those damn corduroy pants.

One can’t say they are being more human than others, not getting caught up with the petty people and their animatistic behaviors and hangups because your not exactly pushing the species along are you?  The genes carrying such enlightened heights of thinking are most likely gonna die with you.

Picture going to the ice cream parlor and getting handed one of those cute little spoons.   The spoon is nothing crazy.  It matches the scenery.   Now look, a little sample of the delightful flavor.  No crazy toppings, no nutritional information, and not a large enough spoon to give one a brain freeze.  Purely allowing one to get and idea of what this flavor is about.  Only then will they be willing to try it with gummie bears or risk the 300 calories.

Of corse you should not be someone else, but for the love of God don’t be yourself.